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Fear of Risking

Running Away From a Relationship You Want

Dear Neil: Why would a man turn down everything he says he wants? The first time we met, he said he thought I was pretty, interesting and sexy. We instantly hit it off, had a great time together and things started progressing very quickly. Our connection was magnificently intimate from the beginning. There was hope, promise and chemistry in the air---and then he freaked out and ran away. And I mean really ran away. He avoided contact with me, and didn't return phone calls or emails. Wanted no contact with me what-so-ever.

Ambivalence: The Hamlet Syndrome

Dear Neil:  I’m hoping you can help me figure out what I’m doing wrong in my romantic relationships.

I meet a nice man, we date several times, he starts to make intimations of getting closer, and I freak out and end our relationship.  I then meet another man.  We date a few times, I find myself increasingly attracted to him—but I wind up picking a fight and then dumping him.  I meet a third man.  We date for awhile.  He is very interested in me and starts getting emotionally involved—and I freak and run away again.

Try Something Different

Dear Neil:  My boyfriend is reluctant to commit to a relationship with me.  He would rather both of us date others and keep our options open.  But I am now 25, and feel the desire to settle down and start a family.  I am sure he loves me.  So I tried harder by seducing him a lot and being extra sweet, hoping that would help him make up his mind.  But to no avail.  So I tried even harder, cooking for him and helping him with his work.  Still to no avail.  So I tried even harder, telling him I was losing my patience with him and was thinking of

Frustrated Man More Committed That The Woman He's Dating

Dear Neil: I am increasingly frustrated at what I think is "Robin's" emotional unavailability. I find myself giving far more to the relationship (and to her) than I receive back. She shows very little emotion or sexual passion, and there is not much of "we" in the relationship. It's mostly about her and her children. I'm 47 and she is 40. We have been dating for 18 months.

When is Someone Good Enough?

Fence Sitting in a Relationship Isn't Satisfying

Fence Sitting in a Relationship Isn't Satisfying

Dear Neil: I am in a four year relationship with a woman I live with, but I am unable--or maybe unwilling--to commit to her.

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