* On paper, tell the story of how your relationship began. Where did you meet, what
attracted you, and what was it about him/her that seem to resonate with some deep wish
or interest of yours?

* What was the first clue that the relationship might fail? This tiny thing that you noticed
could destroyed things, but you chose to ignore? 

* What was going on in your life when you began this relationship? 

* What were you seeking to solve, resolve, understand or to gain at that time that the
relationship assisted you with?

* What did your ex-partner need to add in his or her life that you offered?

* What did he or she gain by being with you? 

* How did the clue of failure emerge in the relationship?

* THE POISON PEN LETTER. Write a letter to your ex-partner in which you
express the full intensity of your anger, rage, hurt and sense of betrayal. Let out every
self-indulgent complaint you have about him/her with no censorship.

* THE LETTER OF CONFESSION. It is also true that you may have acted
inappropriately, made significant mistakes and responded poorly when another response
may have been wiser. What were your failures in the relationship? Write a letter of
apology to your ex, honestly acknowledging what your role was in causing the problems
or in assist e most important lessons you can take from this experience?

* If the story of your relationship were written as a title for a book or a movie, what would
it be called?

What did you discover about yourself--and about your relationship--by doing this exercise?